The Likely News – One – 5th May 2017

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5th May 2017 –

Glasgow City Chambers and the surrounding area has been cordoned off for reasons of public safety.

The drama began early this morning. After emerging victorious in the Council elections and winning control of Glasgow City Council, new SNP councillors entered the City Chambers and began to look at files previously unavailable to them relating to decisions and deals made by the city council over the last 60 years.

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After the container which held the files was opened, a loud bang was heard, followed by otherwordly screams. Jim Murphy, 50, unemployed, was in George Square at the time and described the scene.

It was as if all the demons of hell* had been let loose and all the terrors of the past had come out to get us.

People fled the scene as cars swerved and there were collisions in the confusion.

As yet there is no footage from inside the City Chambers as the police are denying access, however, local artist Clip Part has provided a pair of sketches based on eyewitness accounts..

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David Torrance was available for comment.

*(Hell does not actually exist)
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