Serious Disunity Breaks Out In Yes Camp

I managed to steal this story to break it here from one of our entirely unbiased major media outlets…

Serious Divisions To Break Out In Yes Camp

News is coming out that suggests the most serious disruption in the Yes camp to date will break out tomorrow.

Prominent Independence supporters such as Kevin Williamson, Irvine Welsh, Andrew Smith and Sean McPartlin are said to be preparing to launch a campaign in a pitched battle against another faction in the Yes camp which includes musician Stuart Braithwaite from Mogwai, comedian Frankie Boyle and podcast hosts Krys Kujawa and Michael Greenwell.

The ‘No’ camp were quick to  seize the _end-of-the-world_2433119bopportunity this division in the Yes camp gave them with Johann Lamont saying it was vital to have the debate, Ian Davidson saying “I’ll burst thae wee ratbags”. George Foulkes immediately claimed it was proof positive that the pixies in his garden really had been nibbling his flowers.

What is certain is that this disaster for the Yes camp, cunningly disguised as a Scottish Cup Final, means that it is entirely impossible for Scottish Independence to happen/be a success/not cause the apocalypse (delete as applicable).

Michael Moore claimed that this is the evidence that Scots cannot be left alone for too long without organising themselves along age old tribal hatreds. The fact that the supposed “cup final” is expected to be conducted in a jovial atmosphere was “of no consequence”, said Moore.

John Curtice was, as ever, available for comment.

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