I’M SURE EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE NOW

Climate change, tipping points, oil spill, radiation… all on the way to being fixed because according to the London Evening Standard, Tony is finally on the case.

Well, they use some interesting words. They don’t say “Tony Blair is set to turn his attention toward the serious environmental problems the world now faces. This comes following on from his success in bringing peace to the middle-east, prosperity in all of the UK and a fair and just society”. They don’t say that, as much as Saint Tony of The Church of You-Can-Question-My-Policy-But-Not-My-Motives would have liked them to. What they said was this…

“Tony Blair is set to earn millions of pounds advising an American businessman on how to make money from tackling climate change.

The former prime minister will be paid at least £700,000 a year to act as a “strategic adviser” to Khosla Ventures, a venture capitalist firm founded by Indian billionaire Vinod Khosla.”

Furthermore, if the Standard is right about this, then this not-at-all philanthropic gesture should be viewed in the context of a more pressing crisis that the bLIAR must solve…

He has told friends he needs £5 million a year to fund his lifestyle.

Tony, who has also secretly been a member of The Church of You-Could-Question-My-Motives-But-That-Really-Just-Means-You-Are-Trying-To-Be-Nasty-And-Obstructive for years had this to say…

“Solving the climate crisis is more than just a political agenda item; it’s an urgent priority that requires innovation, creativity and ambition.”

This is presumably the kind of innovation and blue sky thinking that consistently supported more coal and nuclear plants and oversaw a huge airport expansion program. Also, the environmental problems caused by invading countries on false pretexts are to be investigated in a government report that is due to give its findings when everyone is too busy dying of toxic poisoning and skin cancer to notice.

Finally, it is rumouored that Tony is set to join the The Church of I-Don’t-Give-Two-Sideways-F*cks-If-You-Question-My-Motives-Because-I-Am-Stinking-Rich.

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