HOW TO DEAL WITH HECKLERS

I just finished the biography of Bill Hicks written by his friend Kevin Booth and Michael Bertin.

A good read.

Here are three of many Hicks quotes I think are worthwhile reproducing here, 2 of which were not in his shows…

“You judge  culture by how happy people are, not by how much money they have.”

Next is a long one…

“‘He’s a Hitler. He’s a Hitler. Saddam Hussein is a Hitler.’ What does that make you? Goebbels? Quit arming him. ‘He’s a Hitler.’ He was your friend last week. He’s a Hitler now? Trying to motivate people, you know? It’s unbelievable how they got them. People were just like ‘he’s a Hitler.’ Yeah, Bush. Get real man.

‘you like dogs don’t you?’

‘Yeah, we love dogs.’

‘Well, we have an intelligence report that says  here Saddam Hussein likes to fuck dogs in the ass and then take their spine out and use it as a toothpick.’

‘You’re shitting me. Let’s go kill this guy. I had no idea he was that much of a maniac. This is for Rover’ [Bill makes gun noise]

‘That’s what the intelligence reports say. He’s a Hitler. He fucks dogs. Uh-hmmm.’

‘I don’t know, are you sure that’s true?’

‘You like kittens?’

‘Yeah I like kittens, they are cute.’

‘He boils them and eats them.’

‘Fucker, this is for fluffy.’

and finally…

“What we are on is an art war. You’re either on the side of telling the truth and trying to make the world a better place. Or you are on the side of selling garbage to people.”

You should also see how he dealt with hecklers…